TikkoSS on November 30th, 2011

Everyone has a dream country. With a kiasu mindset, instead of having one, I have two, US and Japan. Why US? Maybe because of ‘White Man’s Burden’. I really curious what burden are they talking about.

What about Japan? Please don’t think aside as I am not taking about Hentai or Jap girls. High tech stuffs are what I am eyeing at and sushi of course. Eh, I think I just found my next destination.. hehe..

Have you ever feel like you are on top of the world? No? It is still not too late. I just have mine recently. I mean literally on top of the world.

Mount Baiyu is near the center of the Lvshun. If you ask me how to get there, I really have no clue. What I know is that this place is very close to a residential area. I bet local can point you to the right direction.

If I am not mistaken, just pay about CNY 10 (RM 5) to get a cable car ride all the way to the hill top. I have checked, all in tip top condition. So, you don’t need to buy insurance before boarding the cable car :p

On the peak stands a 66 meter tower, a memorial tower in remembrance of the soldiers who died in the war. It is actually erected by Japanese military leader after Japan defeated Russia.

Speaking of Japanese, this place is closely resembled Japan. I don’t smell sushi here but climbing the Mount Baiyu is actually bowing in the direction of the Imperial Palace in Tokyo.

What more can I ask for when I only visit Japan in my dream. This place is a famous tourist attraction place where you get to visit not only this 66 meter tower but a smaller scale of Eifel Tower alike tower.

Like any other mountain top, you get to experience the fresh wind breeze and nice sceneries. Over here, you can see whole Lvshan and islands surrounding it, quite calm and relaxing to be honest.

I would suggest you to bring your binoculars if you like a zoom in effect. If not, you can purchase a binocular at a ‘tourist price’. More importantly, tourists can get a great range of souvenirs from the stalls around here too.

 

Memorial Tower on Mount Baiyu 

GPS: 38.810854, 121.257195

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TikkoSS on November 27th, 2011

Alcohol beverages to westerner are like Chinese tea to Chinese. Excessive alcohol consumption will definitely get you in trouble.

It is either you are funding the cops indirectly when you drive recklessly or wake up with God knows who on your side not knowing what you did a night before.

Normally I don’t drink but rather enjoy witnessing human behavior especially when they are under a great influenced of alcohol.

Sometimes I do enjoy reading toilet sign in bars or pubs. TOILET SIGN? Oh yea. This one in particular is my favorite. Kind of wonder what does the second bullet means?

Apart from making a joker out of yourself, many great jokes are cracked when you are semi-drunk. My friend, Bob was very close to embarrass himself by wetting his pants in one of a rare occasion. It started like this.

Bob was in urgent need for nature call when he walked to a toilet. Trying to push the door, the door is locked. He waited patiently assuming that there is someone in the toilet.

10 minutes later, he tried but failed again.

Covering his private part as a sign of desperate need to release, he agitatedly asked for help, “Can you help me to ask if anyone in that toilet, I have waited very long and in the verge of exploding in my pant! I really don’t know what that person is doing in the toilet”.

Bob’s friend walked towards the toilet and pulled the door. The door opened and there was no one in there. He questioned Bob, “Is this some kind of jokes?” Bob responded innocently, “I thought I need to PUSH to open the door”.

 

Lesson Learnt: Always learn how to PUSH and PULL to ease yourself. Please don’t think negatively when I say this.

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TikkoSS on November 24th, 2011

You are a cold blooded animal! If someone ever say that to you, please don’t get mad but respond this, “I am a human, mammal and I am a hot blooded creature. Get your biology right!”

Many always equate cold blooded to inhuman or reptile but my definition of cold blooded is flexible! Why so? Cold blooded creature can homogeneously change their body temperature to fit into the environment.. Cool isn’t it? If that is not flexible, what is?

I am not a fan of reptile as they are slimy and ugly little bastards but I ended up in reptile museum. Guess why? The building architecture impresses me a lot.

I walk on a park like usual.. yea, I am a guy that do walk on the park. All of the sudden, I felt a strong magnetic force pulling me to this great looking building. Not knowing how to read Chinese .. I bought a ticket and walked in..

The beginning part of the building is decorated with nice landscape, sorta jungle theme with water feature and I realize small crawling little creature. I can still take it.

Then I saw a section where visitors literally throw their money to. I thought, wow! People here are so rich.. then I realize, there is a white snake which they believe it is a sacred animal.

If you notice the crocs, what I really want to show to you is the faeces (or crocs’ stool) .. hehe..

Like many other reptile museum, you will have snakes for sure.. proly iguana bla bla bla.. I know what you are going to say! My wildlife photography skills is great.. I know..

All these poor creatures are the exhibits behind the glass cages. Kinda pitiful to be honest but hey, “itulah kisah seekor reptilia yang ditangkap”.. that line is just to brush up your Malay.. :p

The museum also displays skeletons of reptiles which I personally find it very unique. It keeps me wonder how they actually collect and preserve it. Quite an art honestly..

Also, the museum displays various reptiles’ reproductive system. Of course, the display is aided with actual frozen models. The photos are a bit 18, so I decided to include in here.

As soon as you walk out the museum, you will find a long walkway full with hawker stalls. If you are a fan of Chinese herbs such as dates, ginsengs, etc.. you can get everything at “tourist price”.

I am not sure if bargain is a norm here but I didn’t do it as the products here are at reasonable price. Killing two birds are not easy but I killed 3 birds that time: i) see crocs stool ii) see the reptiles reproductive system iii) get free dates.. :p

 

Lvshun Snake Museum 

Leyuan Street, Lvshunkou,

Dalian, Liaoning, China

GPS: 38.808892, 121.2367

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TikkoSS on November 21st, 2011

Before Mr. Albert discovers E = MC2 which later led to the development of nuclear weapons, fortress is the best defensive shield against any sort of artilleries.

Fortress can also turn into offensive mode with all heavy weapons such as big canon, missile launch, heat tracking laser, force shield bla bla bla. Okok.. there are no such weapons in ancient time except canon.

Most of the fortresses were built boundary along the territory line like the famous Great Wall of China or by the shoreline like this one here to prevent the invasion from opposite clans.

Huang Hai Fortress turned out to be one of the famous tourist attraction area in Dalian. Over here, we can see weird tourists from all over the place including “rock lover”..

This place is not as creepy as concentration camp in Germany but I wouldn’t want to come here at night as well. The Chinese Government turned this place into a museum to store all the “leftovers” from the post war.

Did you see my dream girl standing over there? or is it a guy? Ops..!

As many of you might know, I am a man with heart.. and I am not those violent type.. scoff ..so the heavy gears did not fancy me. However, I am still glad that all those bullets ended up in this museum..

Why? well, if it did not end up in this museum, I bet it will end up killing many other innocents people. See I told you, I have heart.. :p

History makes people learn but history also taught us, the bigger the better.. Don’t think aside as I am talking about bigger weapons ! Over here, there are plenty of scrap metals a.k.a BIG GUNS.

But there is also a softer side of the fortress where you can buy souvenirs, finger food and so on at “tourist price”. Nonetheless, I feel somewhat powerful when standing infront of gigantic firearms..

 

Dalian Fortress

GPS: 38.793814, 121.26488

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TikkoSS on November 18th, 2011

In years 2050 (I am 21 by then :p), teleport will becomes so common that our future us will get to a destination in a split second. If you look back from then, you will be wondering how ancient people travel few thousand miles by planes.

The circle of life is almost similar now when you are wondering how ancient people travel few hundred kilometers by horses.

Sadly, I am still living in the present world that planes are the only option for me to travel far and fast. It leaves me with no choice but to board the plane from this Liuting Airport to my next destination.

To where? Why not you try to guess first? To me, this is just another airport with self check-in counters and packaging service. Nothing new, really .. beside the futuristic architecture.

Boarding a private jet is like a once-in-a-lifetime-experience. Unfortunately, not this time. As much as I wish the plane belongs to me, I have to share with it with other folks.

I am sure you have read about Bohai Pearl Hotel Dalian, so yes! I was travelling to Dalian before. Rather than telling you about hotel and food only, I have come to my senses to share some nice photos with you.

You know you are inDalian as soon as you see this big giant ball, or many called it Friendship Square. Beside this ball, you can experience the oldest functioning tram. What so special about it?

The driver is girl and girl only. Don’t ask me why coz I was on my iPod when the tourist guide mumbled. If you don’t trust girl driver, my advice is don’t try it!

This place is quite developed. A lot of modern skyscraper and internationally recognized hotel too!

About 5 min walk from my hotel, I found a food street! Of course this is not as famous as WangFuJing – The Food but still, you can get a lot of decent stomachache-free food here.

The food is rather cheap. Some cost as low as RMB 5 only or as high as RMB 30.

If this place did not excite you, walk along this Tian Jin Jie Street and you will come across a seafood street. Exotic or not, have a peep on your next table and see what they ordered before you go for yours.

Nightlife is awesome here. There are a lot of shopping malls and hawker stalls operating at awkward hours with nicely decorated lightings.

Over here, I found my dream girl. Despite a bit shy in the beginning, I took a big courage to ask her out, BUT she did not entertain me even I pestered her for few minutes. She only allowed me to take her photos. How sad :(

Before I end this post, I spotted this cute furry little animal. I wonder what it is. Dog, wolf, huskies? I really cannot tell.. Maybe you can tell me..

 

Dalian Frienship Square

GPS: 38.92154, 121.643758

Dalian Tian Jin Jie

GPS: 38.920555,121.636291

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TikkoSS on November 15th, 2011

Steamed Egg

Ingredients

2 Eggs

Warm water

¾ tsp salt

½ tsp TikkoSS’s Secret Ingredient

2 cloves Garlic (Finely chopped) – Can be replaced with small onion or go without it.

2 tbsp Light soy sauce

 

Method

1. Heat wok with 1½ tbsp oil. Fry garlic until golden brown and fragrant. Set aside.

2. Well beaten the eggs and add warm water (the amount should be the same as the mixture of well beaten eggs).

3. Add salt and TikkoSS’s secret ingredient into the egg mixture. Mix well. (Notes: You will have smoother steam egg on the surface if you remove the bubbles on top of the egg mixture prior steaming it)

4. Cook rice and steam the rice on top of the cooked rice for 10 to 15 minutes or until the egg mixture is set. (Notes: Don’t steam the egg from the beginning. You need to wait until the rice is cooked first)

5. Remove steamed egg from rice cooker, add garlic with oil and soy sauce. Ready to be served.

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TikkoSS on November 9th, 2011

When you read about Dalian Seafood Restaurant, you know I was there before. Probably you will ask me this question, if happen that one day I go to Dalian, China, where should I stay?

I cannot possibly list all the options for you as there are many decent hotels around there but I can share with you where I stayed before this. I stayed under the highway bridge like those unfortunate one. That is obviously a lame line.

5 stars hotel is too expensive for me so I resorted in 3-4 stars hotel, Bohai Pearl Hotel Dalian. Bear in mind that 3-4 stars hotel over here is not exactly 3-4 stars ya! So, don’t have too high expectation on it.

This hotel is situated beside Dalian Train Station. How convenient if you are planning to go there by train, right? Only about 5 min walk, walla, the cozy hotel is just right there.

The hotel is a bit creepy as you walk in the lobby as they did not turn on the light during the day time. “Saving the energy” I presume.

The room rate was reasonable to me and I managed to get special discount when I book over the internet too! As you can see, the lists of the room prices are vary depending on which day you go! So, pick the right date.

From a quick glance, I noticed a small glitch on the notice board. The temperature shows 26 deg C. Honestly, this place is colder than you thought, I mean Dalian in general. So bring along your wind breaker.

The walkway to room is not impressive but the room is decent. I wouldn’t use the word classy but it is rather neat and tidy AND they still use the “Big Potato” TV. It makes me feel like I am travelling back to 80’s.

For bookworms, this room is not recommended as the lightings are meant for romantic ambience. Good if you can bring along your partners with you. Bet they are going to love it.

No COFFEE, only tea. This is just a reminder for coffee lover, please bring your own sachets of coffee just incase you are craving for it.

Like any other hotel, phone is provided in this room but all in Chinese. No option for language selection :p. So, don’t be surprise if none of them speak English when you call for room service.

The room comes with 2 bottles of complimentary drinking water and of course, toiletries as well. Although I am expecting slighting bigger bathroom but the size is just nice to fit ONLY one person at the same time.. hehe.

The bathtub is not the same like any other hotel. It is rather shallow to fill a fat.. I mean fit people like me. In general, this hotel is so so only but the price is reasonably cheap as compared to others. Remember, book online to get cheaper deal!

 

Bohai Pearl Hotel 

8, Zhoushuizi Road, Shengli Square

116001 Dalian, China

TEL: +86 411 8882 8333

GPS: 38.921632, 121.635336

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TikkoSS on November 6th, 2011

Long long before your time, marriage was not about finding your own true love. When you reached the age of puberty or in other words, when you grown up, everything will be “arranged” for you.

Parents will be extremely busy filtering the potential candidates, matchmakers will starts an excel spreadsheet on the availability of singles (I am just kidding on excel spreadsheet) and wedding planners will start to sharpen their knife to slaughter every possible wedding couples.

Ancient people believed that “Love is never about first sight, never about chemistry, never about mutual feelings but love can be cultivated through time”.

So, please expect that you might potentially marry a complete stranger that you never know he/she exists before.

This is slightly different if you are a princess from royal family. Normally, the parents will arrange a sort of tournaments and series of interviews to choose the cream of the cream to be the rightful son-in-law.

This was based on true story. A very “PHAT” princess just turned 18 (I am just guessing the legal age at that time is still 18 :p).  The King summoned all the most eligible bachelors for a tournament and the top 3 will undergo the final interview with both King and Queen.

After the tournament completed, TOP 3 were chosen. King and Queen were very excited to meet their potential son-in-law. Everyone was very excited as well BUT the interview was conducted in Panic Room alike chamber, where literally nothing can go in or out.

The interview starts.

 

King: Tell me, what do you have to marry my lovely princess?

Candidate 1: I am talented in martial art, received PhD with highest honor, I am rich and filial. Everyone says I am the most eligible bachelor.

Queen: Very impressive, looks like my princess is a step closer to get his love one.

Candidate 2: Wait a minute, many people believes that I am the extinct fairy-tales alike guy. I am romantic, spiritually attractive, coming from well known and multibillionaire family.

Queen: Looks like we are going to have a very tough decision to make, my dear King. Both are equally good.

King: Let’s hear from third candidate first and then, we can choose the best of all.

Candidate 3: I have nothing close Candidate 1 and Candidate 2. I am not rich, I am not smart, I am not a fairy-tales alike guy but I have one thing they don’t!

 

Both Kings and Queens were very curious. Inside their mind, this guy was nothing as compared to other two.

 

King: Tell me what is that one thing you have they both don’t ?

Candidate 3: A kid.

Queen: A kid? Where is the kid? I want to see what so special about the kid.

Candidate 3: The kid is inside your daughter.

 

King and Queens puzzled for few seconds and ask the other 3 candidates to wait in an isolation room. Ten minutes later, the King officially announced that Candidate 3 will be his rightful son-in-law.

What happen to the other two? Both never see the sunlight again.. Why? Duh.. because the other two know the candidate 3 answer (royal secret) laa..

This is based on true story? Er.. I don’t think so, I am just pulling your leg :P

 

Lesson Learnt: i) You don’t need to be genius or handsomely rich, all you need is just right move at the right time.. ii) maybe this does not sounds right but when you find your right one, put “deposit” first ! :P

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TikkoSS on November 3rd, 2011

This post is the continuation from the previous one. If you miss it, please visit Translator – It is never an easy job (Part 1/2) to get the full pictures…


Scene 5:

After 30 minutes, the girl called again.

Lady 2 (C) : You must help me this time. I give him B***J*** since just now but he is still very soft. My jaw is very tired and I cannot do it no more.

Mr. A (C) : Pass the phone to him and let me ask if he want to call off.

Mr. Bob (E) : Mr. A, I need your help here.

Mr. A (E) : How can I help you when you are there doing it? I cannot possibly replace your position.

Mr. Bob (E) : No.. that kind of help. Can you help to get my best buddy Mr. Vi**** from nearest pharmacy?

Mr. A (E) : But it will be made in China. No pharmaceutical approval for this kind of medication here. It might cause your heart to pump too fast that you might ended up with cardiac arrest. You sure?

Mr. Bob (E) : Just go and get it. Afterall, I can eat half of it and it should also cut my heart rate to half too.

 

Scene 6:

Mr. A quickly rushed to the nearest pharmacy shop and asked for Mr. Vi****. The lady pharmacist looks puzzled. She seems to have million dollar question in her mind and here it goes.

Pharmacist (C): Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?

Mr. A (C) : Yes, go ahead.

Pharmacist (C): You looks very young and you already “cannot”?

Mr. A (C) : No la.. it is not for me. It is for my friend.

Pharmacist (C): Many people say the same thing when they buy this. You don’t have to be shy. I would suggest you to seek medical opinion as taking this at your age are not advisable.

Mr. A (C) : What do you mean I cannot? I can prove it to you and I am sure mine is as hard as steel rod.

Pharmacist (C): I have gone through this before. My advice is still the same. Please see doctor the soonest.

Mr. A (C) : Arghhh…. (Walk away)

 

Scene 7:

As soon as he returned to hotel, he passed the Vi**** to Mr. Bob. Then he safely returned to his room. Not long after that, Bob called again.

Mr. Bob (E) : I don’t know what happen but the girl just sit there. I ask her to take of her clothes, shouted at her but she still sit there. Can you speak to her please and ask her what she want?

Mr. A (C) : How come you just sit there? He asked you to take off you clothes.

Lady 2 (C) : How should I know? I don’t understand single words he said. So, I just sit there until he instructs me what to do.

Mr. A (C) : He is telling you to take off your clothes and do your work!

Lady 2 (C) : Ohh.. Ok.. No wonder he is so angry.

 

Scene 8:

This time, there is no phone call but Mr. A heard a knock on his room door. This time Mr. Bob, half nakedly approached Mr. A.

Mr. A (E) : What happen, Mr. Bob? Is everything ok? The Vi**** not working or the girl did not take off her clothes?

Mr. Bob (E) : No no. The Vi**** works fine and the girl did take off her clothes.

Mr. A (E) : Then what is the problem?

Mr. Bob (E) : The girl is too smelly! I suspect that she didn’t take shower for ages. I can still smell her urine when I lick her P****. Her teeth are yellowish and full with leftover greens.

Mr. A (E) : Then how can you allow her to give you a B***J**

Mr. Bob (E) : I cannot see. She either turn off the light or dimmed it..

 

Later, Mr. Bob decided to call off the deal and sent the girl back. Mr. A was very relief after that BUT he quitted his job the next day.

 

Remarks:

(C) – Conversation in Chinese

(E) – Conversation in English

Lesson Learnt: There is no job in this world that is easy. Every job has its own challenges and THE “moments”. You can either choose to stay or leave. That is your choice!

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